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Thursday, 21 July 2005
What if the Hokey Pokey really is what it's all about?
Mood:
 not sure
Now Playing: Music That Doesn't Suck, vol. 16
So I'm sitting here, trying to get some work done, & I just can't focus. I've been like that for nearly the whole summer, it seems. And it's not that I'm just distracted by random things, it's more like my whole thought process is distracted by something. It could be any number of things -- getting ready to move next month, wondering how things are going to be different when Eric starts grad school in the fall, etc. -- but I think what's frustrating me the most is that I don't know if I'm heading in the direction, professionally, that I want to go in. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy what I'm doing in the lab, but I'm having a hard time seeing what "next step" this research is actually leading me to. Am I wasting my time? Are they finally going to realize that I'm an idiot & don't know what I'm doing?
I guess I've been feeling this way for awhile, but it actually took having that Animal Behavior class this summer to make me realize that maybe I don't want to work in a rat lab the rest of my life. I've been having nagging thoughts of "why didn't I stick with wanting to be a veterinarian?" Oh yeah, biology! But still, there's gotta be something I could do to combine all this time/effort I've put into my psychology major & beyond with my continued desire to work with animals. That's where Animal Behavior came in -- maybe I could do Animal Assisted Therapy? I guess now would be better than later to make a change like that, especially since I haven't officially started my Master's. I don't know. I've got a lot more thinking to do.
*sigh*
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